My husband asked me tonight what it felt like, physically and emotionally when I told him I had to walk away from my daughter because I couldn't be near her at the moment. This is the best I could come up with:
You're the oldest brother or sister in the family and your younger sibling does something wrong, but you're the one catching shit for it. So there you are, getting reamed out by your mother or father while your brother or sister does the "na na na na boo boo" dance behind them, while sticking out their tongue and wiggling their ass in hilarity. The intense urge to smack the shit out of them while they're doing that is exactly how I feel. Here I am, feeding her, rocking her and soothing her to go to bed and she's doing everything in her power that pisses me off from smacking down on the bottle to scratching me to letting the formula drool out of her mouth.
And that's what it feels like.
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